Not In My Element

I am supposed to be inspired and raring to go.  I am supposed to execute my grand plan. I am supposed to accomplish the task.  Instead, i feel like I am not in my element.  I should be getting my ass off and work.  I am supposed to be brimming with bright ideas.  Instead, the design looks terrible.  What is wrong with me?  I am supposed to let the creative juices flow.  I am supposed to bask in the final outcome.  Instead, there is a strong sense of discontent.  What is wrong? 

Procrastination

It’s what I opted to do, instead of finishing my long overdue portfolio.  A couple of pages more, a little layout, and I am supposed to be done.  Maybe it’s the cold weather.  I am trying to find other excuses. 

My excuses are:

1) I am blogging,  “to hone my writing skills”…hehehe..  Who am I kidding?  I am not a professional blogger.  This is supposed to be a hobby and to while away my time.  However,  I could rant and rave all I want without being judged.  Unlike in my portfolio, which will definitely reflect my “professional” capabilities.

2) I have lots of time in my hands.  So, I assume.  Subtracting the time I am supposed to prepare and commute to and from work, I have this “illusion” of having more free time. Home based work certainly has its disadvantages.  Without a boss looking over your shoulder, you could do as you please, at your own pace.  However, I think it’s becoming detrimental to my “profession”.  Instead of finishing the task early, I use most of my time blogging and surfing.

3) Christmas preparations.  This is our first Christmas as a married couple,  I am pretending that I could beat Martha Stewart at her own game.  There’s the tree to trim, gifts to shop and wrap, cakes to bake and food to prepare.  Very lame excuses, I am sure even Martha finishes her paper works before wearing her homemaker’s hat.  Again, homemaking is not my primary “profession”.

I hope my sense of urgency and right priorities return before I turn into a habitual procrastinator.  While I still have the luxury of this glorious, though soon to be limited, free time… I will enjoy and bask in it.

Procrastination..Love it and Hate it!